I believe Bird's lovely wife Brandi gave birth to their 4th child this morning, a little girl named Evangeline. (Named for the gospel! Love it.)

The number of little Thinklings grows!

Macy (8) has a diary. She brought it to church last night and took notes. Here are a few lines:

Dad is preaching to the people. Dad said it is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting, for death is the destiny of every man. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ's sufferings . . .

Those are God's words that Dad just presented to me. They will be treasured forever.

Our oldest turns 8 today. Time has flown. Seems like just yesterday she was toddling around the house, chattering to "Memo" (Elmo) on her playphone. Now she's writing "novels" and original musical compositions.

Our little beauty's growing up.

Macy 5 years or so ago, about the time I started blogging:



Macy this year:



Happy Birthday, baby girl.

Grace (5): Sissy is speaking to me in her mean voice.

Me: I'm sorry. That's not very nice, is it?

Grace: No. So I don't want to be her sister any more.

Me: Well, that's not nice either. That's pretty mean.

Grace: Well, why should I be nice to her if she's not gonna be nice to me?

Me: Because that's called grace. That's why we named you that, remember? Remember that grace means being nice to someone and loving them even if they don't deserve it.

Grace: She doesn't deserve it.

Me: I know. But it would be easy to be sweet to her if she was being sweet to you, wouldn't it? If she was being nice to you, wouldn't you want to be nice to her?

Grace: Uh huh.

Me: But that's not grace. Grace means being sweet to your sister even if she's not being sweet to you.

Grace: Why would I want to do that?

Me: Because that's what God did for us. He loved us even though we're really bad. Didn't he?

Grace: Ohhh. Yeah. I'm gonna go watch TV now.

My cousin Josh filmed this quick video of Gracie (5) being her daredevil self. She asked if she could ride her bike "off the cliff," and being the awesome dad I am, I said of course. I'm the dude off camera, watching with pride, and then stepping in after the damage is done.


Gracie Knievel from Jared Wilson on Vimeo.

Thinkling Readers, I Need Your Help!

My oldest child is a 7 year old boy and in the second grade. He's reading very well for his age. (I'm gonna guess that he's reading on about a 5th-6th grade level or higher.) He reads a minimum of 100 pages a day. I'm having a hard time keeping up with his habit. Our school library lets parents check out books in large numbers, so I've been doing that. The problem I'm having is that (right now) I have the (naive?) belief that just because he CAN read something doesn't mean he SHOULD. It seems that most of the books that are on a middle school reading level assume a middle schooler is reading them. (Understandable) So these books have content that I'm not sure my second grader is ready for. Murder, kidnapping, child abuse, divorce, non-christian religions etc...

None of these books are bad or explicit, it's just that I'm not sure that I'm ready for my second grader to read about kids whose parents don't love them or even beat them.

So here are my questions for you.

#1- Am I being ridiculous? For example, I just checked out some books from "The Sugar Creek Gang" by Paul Hutchens and "Baker Street Sports Club" by Jerry Jenkins. Both series are published by Moody and are quite similar in "conflict". The narrator is a new christian, lots of explicit Bible and Christian talk, witnessing to friends, parents who are alcoholics and beat their children, kidnapping, hurt feelings etc...

I've found many books that are perfect for him reading level wise, but because they are targeted towards "reluctant readers", they are actually assuming a high school mentality reading at a middle school level. So those books deal with things way beyond a second grader.

I just wish that I could find more books like Henry Huggins, Ralph S. Mouse, Homer Price, the Boxcar Children etc...

I'm looking for books where there is adventure without ruining childhood quite yet. Sheesh! He's only 7, but so many of the books that he's ready to read assume he's 12. But books targeted to 7 year olds are just big picture books that he's waaaay beyond.

But I'm starting to think I might just have to suck it up and start letting him read about alcoholics and child abuse. I'm just not sure he's (or if I'm) ready for that yet.

#2 - Do you have any recomendations?

The other day on the way home from school while talking about actual punishment one of my boys had earned, I was getting irritated that the "not in trouble" son was pushing for severe punishment. So I made an off-hand remark that maybe we should take away the "in trouble" son's screen priviledges for a whole year. Whoops. The "in trouble" son doesn't understand sarcasm yet and thought I was serious. He lost his temper in a millisecond. As I was calming him down and trying to explain why I said that, I apologized to him and I thought, "So this is what that verse means."

We tell children that they should obey their parents, and indeed they should. The Bible makes it clear that it is for their own good. (Ephesians 6:1-3). But we parents should not fail to notice the responsibility that goes along with that. It is not obedience for its own sake, but for the sake of your kids. We are supposed to be giving them rules and instructions that will help their lives. Our children are gifts but not just for our amusement or so we can have someone to boss around.

“Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4).

Another way to translate this is “Do not provoke your children to anger.” This certainly doesn’t mean that our children have to like everything we tell them or that we have to be afraid that rules will make them angry. Paul is talking about deliberately stirring them up. As parents, we shouldn’t lord our authority over our children or make them do things just because we can. Another way we do this, I think, is when we parade our children out as forced entertaiment like dancing, costumed chihuahuas every time company comes over.

Children should be allowed reasonable freedom, within boundaries. When we enforce rules inconsistently or use our authority in an unpredictable or seemingly unmotivated manner, it provokes them to anger, sometimes justifiably so. We don’t like to be treated that way, neither do our kids.

Our children need a steady, even-handed approach to discipline. In another place, Paul says,

“do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged” (Colossians 3:21).

Unnecessary rules, unreasonable standards and endless griping about petty things creates resentment and inner feelings of rebellion.

Instead of exasperating them, we are supposed to be bringing them up in the instruction of the Lord. In other words, if we aren’t teaching them to follow Jesus, we aren’t doing what God expects of parents. A literal translation of Ephesians 6:4 reads “nourish them in the instruction and discipline of the Lord.” This means teaching them regularly to follow Jesus, not only with our words but with our actions. Therefore we should be helping them to feel loved at all times. We are supposed to be nourishing their spirits, not just controlling their external behavior.

Our number one priority is not obedience for its own sake, or the opposite extreme, their happiness, but their regard for their Lord. Their obedience and their happiness must be means to that end. We do this by teaching and training them in God’s word. This is the Christian parents’ highest calling and privilege. Though we all wish good things for our children, we should care more for their love and loyalty to Christ above everything else.

Parents should care more for the loyalty of their children to Christ than for anything besides, more for this than for their health, their intellectual vigour and brilliance, their material prosperity, their social positions, their exemption from great sorrows and great misfortunes. (Dale, cited in "Ephesians" TNTC by Francis Foulkes, p. 173)

It’s true for us and it’s true for them, without Christ all of those things are meaningless.

What are some other ways that normal good decent parents exasperate their children? Do you have any advice or tips?

Joe Thorn: My Dad, The Christian

Macy (7), as she, appropos of nothing, abruptly rises from the couch mid-conversation:

"I'm going to the toy room to practice my dance moves."

See that you do not look down on one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven.
-- Matthew 18:10

It is a common question, because it is unfortunately a common occurrence: losing a baby. I think we all tend to believe that God receives departed infants into heaven, but perhaps we're not sure why we believe (other than that the alternative seems unconscionable). Many times grieving families seek assurance. This post is my imperfect attempt at offering cause for hope.

Read the rest of this entry . . .

Saturday morning I told my girls that I would take them to see Bolt at the theater that afternoon.
They played sweetly together most of the morning, but midway through the day they just kept getting on each other's nerves, and after several warnings to stop didn't prevent them from aggravating each other, I finally employed the nuclear option. "Never mind on the movie," I said and explained why.

An hour or so later, I was giving them a bath in preparation for errands. I had decided that I would spring the movie on them as a surprise and use my changed mind as a way to explain grace to them (which Becky and I do a lot).

During the bath, Grace said, "I've gotta get my neck clean because I can't take dirt on my neck into the movie theater."

"Why do you think you're going to a movie?" I asked. "I told you we weren't."

She looked at me unfazed and said, "Yeah, but I prayed to God and said I'd be sweet and I know he'll give me a second chance."

Turns out after I left the room after taking the movie plan away, both girls decided to pray to God to apologize for not being sweet and to ask for another chance.

Isn't it awesome that we worship the God of second (and third and fourth and fifth . . .) chances?

It was also weird and fun to have been the unwitting answer to my daughters' prayer!

(We're still working on the concept of being sweet not to avoid consequences or to have consequences rescinded but because it's the right thing to do. :-)

On the radio this morning Brant Hansen was talking about some national parents' group that is trying to organize a protest against toy companies to get them to stop advertising until after the holidays. The parents are saying that all the commercials are making their kids want stuff they can't afford, and the parents don't want to have to explain to their kids that they don't have the money.

Brant's response, and I think it was a good one, was basically that "It's a good thing to explain to your kids that you can't afford everything."

He was kind of exasperated that parents would resort to protesting businesses advertising simply because they're too ________ (lazy? scared? weak? embarrassed?) to tell their kids money doesn't grow on trees. "Are you trying to get elected?" he said.

Seriously.

I know it's never fun to tell your kids they can't have something they want. Because we love our kids and want them to be happy. But because we love our kids and want them to be happy we should explain to them where money comes from, that it is finite, and that, above all, getting everything you want isn't the source of happiness anyway. Having this conversation these parents want to avoid is a prime catalyst for training our kids to think more selflessly and less consumeristically and to exercise moderation and self-control.

I ain't praying for no depression or anything (;-), but I do think hard(er) economic times can be fertile ground for cultivating less consumerism in the Church.

Macy lost the election for president of her 2nd grade class by 4 votes.

She ran on a platform of eradicating pollution, increasing recycling, and helping animals.
Her opponent promised 20 extra minutes of recess.

Panderer.

(Btw, John McCain won the girls' school-wide mock presidential election.)

Grace (5) just announced at the dinner table, out of nowhere and in response to nothing, "I'm not who you think I am!"

Is Being a Stay-at-Home Dad a Sin? (Part 2)

My latest at SearchWarp:

Is Being a Stay-at-Home Dad a Sin? (Part 1)

Macy (7) and Grace (5) are at the table, working on their homework.

Grace says to Macy, "I love Daddy. He's so cute."

Grace (5): How old is God?

Dada: He doesn't have an age. He existed before the world was made and anyone was ever born.

Grace: So he's 100 years old?

Dada: No, he's infinite. He's been around since forever, but he doesn't age like we do.

Macy (7): He's God.

Grace: I know that!

Dada: He's not a person.

Grace: Yes he is. He is a person.

Dada: Well, he's a Person, but not like us. He's not a human being.

(long pause)

Grace: I'm not a bean.

Macy: BEE-ing! Not bean.

Grace: I'm not a bee either.

Macy: That's not what I said!

Grace: I'm glad I'm not a bean or a bee 'cause I'd get eaten up or I'd get stung and then I'd die.

Macy: A BEING!

Grace: What's a bing?

Macy (7) has been doing this devotional every night that has a journal in it. I was reading through her entries just now and came across her response to the instructions "Write out a prayer." I thought I'd share it with you (all spelling, correct and incorrect, original).

Dear God,

I always dreamed to be a horse rider. Now I want to be a vet. But that's not my top priorty. I always wanted a choclate lab and a miniture doxen. And any kind of cat. I love piano.
Could you help me play a little better.

Thank you,
Amen

The "Could you help me play a little better" part got me. Love her.

(Also, fyi, we're working on this cat fixation. It will be eradicated.)

As I rub my face on Grace's cheek:

Me: I'm giving you my beard.

Grace (5): No!

Me: You don't want a beard?

Grace: No. Because then I'd look like a man. And I'd be crazy and dumb.