Also, I'm almost positive I've posted a post just like this before, but I couldn't find it. If this post is a duplicate, my apologies in advance for being from the Department of Redundancy Department.

I don't know if we have any good ones . . .

I suppose that there may be:
"Ummmmmmmm . . . . no."
Akin to "I don't think so." "Ummm" is held out for at least two seconds and the "no" is quick and usually at a lower pitch.

This isn't really a phrase, however, and may not fit the idea of the post since most strangers would completely pick up on its meaning. I'll ask Jen and get back to you . . .

We do the "hello" and "sweet" things, well, at least I do, but different. It's "helluuuuu" with a long U sound and "Sweet" is long a low, growl instead of high pitched. Same meanings, basically. Here's one that comes to mind.

"sew buttons on ice cream" - said after someone lets out a long "soooooooo ..." indicating that they are still sorting through in their head what comes next. While they are still figuring it out, you say "sew buttons on ice cream"

Boy, it's hard to resist telling the story behind it! I'll play by the rules, though. :-P

Yeah, I think "hello" and "sweet" are both pretty common, though the particular soundings vary. Let's see, for us . . .

"What about the plot, Hemingway?" (Response to anything coming clean out of left field. Proper response in return: "Who cares? Anvils are funny!")

"You been here four hour! You go home now!" (Said in imitation Chinese accent, to suggest that maybe it's time for us to move on.)

Also, though it's not exactly a phrase, when I'm talking/playing with my kids, I'll sometimes randomly insert/substitute squid in the conversation. (What about the plot? Who cares? Squid are funny!)

Well done, everyone.

Salguod, we also say it "helluuuuuuuuu" - with a long "u" sound. I agree that "hellooooo" and "sweeeeet" are pretty self explanatory and just right on the line for what's kosher for this post.

AM - those are fascinating!

SG - so's "Sew buttons on ice cream" - excellent.

Here's another one we do:

[Said with a big, desperate smile] "Cowboy Dan is Coming!" - translation: Although things look bleak and no-fun right now, don't worry - it's going to get better real soon (we hope).

This next one's self explanatory, but done in a way that's unique enough, I think, to qualify. "Awk . . . ward" [and while you're saying it, you make the "quotes" fingers, but only with one hand (very important that it only be with one hand]] - translation: OK, this is a little awkward. The amount of dead-time between "Awk" and "Ward" is directly correlated to the awkwardness of the current situation. It is also permissible to just do the one hand quote thing, without saying "Awk . . . ward" - especially when saying "Awk . . . ward" aloud would itself be kind of awkward.

"I'm going to weigh four hundred pounds" - translation: What I'm about to eat sure looks good.

"Scuttle it here, we'll walk ashore." My dad is a Navy man, of course. He would say this every time he parked the car. My sister and I would roll our eyes. Funny thing is I've caught myself saying it and I always think it when anyone parks a car I'm riding in.

Are you stupid yet? Just typing that one made me laugh a little. This comes from when I was a teenager - I was clearing the dinner table and was about to take my mother's plate. Instead of asking her if she was done eating, that question popped out of my mouth. We all busted out laughing in disbelief. To this day I have no clue where it came from, but we still say it in the context of clearing the table.

I'm sure there are more that I can't think of right now.

Jen forgot "I blueshirted it," which is a reference to spilling food on your shirt during a meal.

And much like her, I find myself saying the "scuttle" quote a LOT.

And jen broke the rule by explaining the history behind the quotes. RULEBREAKER!

"Alligators in the sewer" for something that is ominous. Of course everyone knows where that came from.

LOVE that quote.

Stroke is caught saying that every so often . . .

I suppose we could add:
"Not Today, Boys!"
Used to show defiance toward a certain uprising in thought, usually followed by domination of the person uttering the phrase.

I did NOT say it every time...more like every time we had to park some distance away, or in a tight spot. Gimme a break!

They left out, "There's more where that went," a reference to any unplanned expense, and "They'll print more," another money expression used whenever we were told we didn't have the money for that impulsive purchase.

Speaking of money, we chant/sing "We got five thousand DOLL-ars, we got five thousand DOLL-ars" any time some unexpected monetary amount comes are way (note: it's hardly ever a real five thousand dollars - we say this over finding an extra five dollar bill :-).

It's gotta be done to that congo-line beat "Da dut-da dut-da DAAAAA da, da dut-da dut-da DAAAAA da"

Dad scuttled cars quite a lot. And everyone else seems to be sharing what they mean...

There's also "You're a diode" or "Don't be a diode." I said this to Beau once and he's adopted it as well. Usually in reference to not sharing some tasty morsel or not offering to get some tasty morsel for the other person when you go get some for yourself.

Thanks for pointing that out Jean-Claude
means you just said something ridiculously obvious and not helpful at this point in time.

Deal with it, Roundhead
means what it says!

We say, "I'm going to go shake a tower" when we are going to take a shower.

"Bend over and I'll show you" - We use this anytime someone asks where to put something.

Whenever someone starts whining we also bust out with, "And WHY is the carpet all wet Todd?!?!"

"Da le su mucous"
This means "Give him his booger". This is said when a child is being obnoxious or whining and we try to pacify him. We're Mexican, and my Uncle told a story about a spoiled neighbor girl who got everything, even got to pick her nose in front of people, and her mother would say this when someone tried to stop her.

Here are some I use at work (so, not necessarily "in the family" and so, potentially, not within the bounds of this post - but it's my post, so . . . )

"There's a wall there" - you have to say this while moving your hand, palm facing you, vertically down and up in front of your body - and it must be said like Kronk. I say this when playing racketball, which I stink at, whenever I smash my dumb self against the wall.

"Wee nip of liquid courage" - This is what I call a diet coke. You have to say this in a scottish accent.

Dad, you forgot "Fuuun!" (or "How fun!").
Used in reference to anything that is either fun or actually not fun at all. Hard to describe when to use it. Originally said to make fun of mom because she says this a lot, especially on the phone - which is more fun to make fun of because you can only hear her side, and so all you hear is "Fun! .... how FUN! ....how fuuun...", etc., each with different vocal inflections and emphases.

Oh yeah, and "Hm? Someone's throwing something. You gonna make a fire, or what?" after throwing anything at anyone. Must be said in an overly oblivious voice and with a fake inconspicuous face.

Also, can't forget about "Llama faaaaaace!" at pretty much any point in time when complaining, and "the Dash likes" when complimenting yourself or looking at yourself in the mirror. Along the same lines as your infamous "Bill Roberts - zero defects" routine.

Oh yeah, and mom reminded me of this one - how could you forget? - "Check the mail", when you and mom go out!

Mom also reminded me of the whole "Molly moment" bit, to give a title to any blond moment I may have.

And, this one is new, and maybe exclusively for the Ukraine trip, but I think it deserves a place here anyway: "This would be the time to call the church" - when all other options run out ;).

Thanks Molly - those are good ones!

"We're not gonna make it" - Jill and I say this to each other when experiencing difficulty, but it's the way it's said that is, in fact, meant to encourage. This only works if the difficulty is a moderate one.

It's encouraging because I sing it to the tune of Twisted Sister's We're Not Gonna Take It.

What a whippin'
Refers to anything that is a real pain in the booty or ridiculous in anyway whatsoever.

Do not pass go; do not collect 200 dollars: Just do it now, no detours, no complaints.

so funny - we use a lot of the Emperor's New Groove quotes too. so I won't repeat them.
some originals-

"He's British, but more so." - whenever we find out someone's gay (I hope that isn't offensive to gay people of to British people or to gay British people. no offense intended to anyone). great story too..

"now you don't know what the heck to think" - whenever someone says one thing, immediately says the opposite, and then comes back around to the original or even a third option.

oh there's so many...

"As they say in the greek 'eckifino"

Translation should be obvious, if you know that ' in greek is the transliterated "h" sound. And you have to say 'eckifino very fast.

"Aleph, Bet, Gimmel, Dalet, Hebrew is what we call it"
- Said whenever we have to memorize something.
-Sung in a sing-song- to the tune of "I don't care if it rains or freezes as long as I have my plastic Jesus on the dashboard of my car".

I'm late to the party, but we have some fun ones.

How fast can a train go? Used to egg someone into doing something they don't want to do/are scared of doing (originally from the amusing experience of coercing mom onto the Big Thunder Mountain Railroad at Disney. She doesn't do roller coasters.)

How far can 500 meters be? Used to encourage someone to just go ahead and walk rather than drive or look around for a closer spot, etc.

2,500 comfortable sport seats! Used to sell the benefits of something that you know is going to be very boring but that one member of the family wants to do, but only if everyone else goes.

"Let me help you with that." is something my wife started and actually means something closer to "let me help me with that". It might mean I'm just gonna reach over and have a bite of your ice cream or then there was the time that I had failed to turn the wipers on fast enough for my wife, so she reached over and turned them on herself saying, "let me help you out with that."

Headed on over here from Lintefiniel Jen's, whose "stupid, yet?" story is hilarious! hee.

Family Quotes:
"Narrow and Picturesque!" - Describing an extraordinarily lovely or scary road.

"I'm too sexy for a name" - Introductions of my brother to very close friends. This one isn't so common, but is funny to us.

"I know where you are, and I know what you're doing." - I took this one to college with me. It generally refers to someone occupied in "the necessary room/latrine", but it can be applied to other situations, as well.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh!" - said in ethereal angelic tones, when someone has a brilliant idea.

"TEN!" - as an answer to a question or sometimes just a reaction to a startling experience.

Friend Quotes:
"No. There's an elephant in the way." - Said when the other person in the conversation doesn't know how to answer a question.

"Now-With-Less-Flooding" - refers to a very specific parking spot near our favorite swing dance club

"Potato Wave" - Sometimes a greeting or farewell. Proper response is usually any one of the misheard lyrics, like "Make Me Fries!" :-)

I'm sure I'll think up more, but isn't it funny how we all have these phrases, and then they're normal to us...but then other people would be very confused?

I remembered another one:

No you may not (also sometimes No I can not). This means "no", but usually really means "yes", when someone asks if they can do something or if you're asked to do something.

The key is you have to say it using the voice of Comic Book Guy from the Simpsons.